Put your big girl panties on and deal with it!

HICCUP! HICCUP! HICCUP!

Who knew that really strong hiccups could be so annoying and distressing? Every time I eat or drink, I get terrible hiccups that are so strong they almost make me ill. Sometimes I get them at night too and actually wake up Chris. The kids think they're funny!!!

MOON FACE

So I'm on this extremely high dose steroid regimine to help with reactions to the chemo. It is 4-5 times more potent than Prednisone and I take mega-doses of it. It gives me lots of interesting side effects, but the weirdest one is "moon face". I kept noticing that my cheeks look fat. Chris said it wasn't THAT noticeable, but did look like I was keeping food in my cheeks. That in addition to a red face and neck, make me look like a harvest moon :)

ADHD

OK, I love mulit-tasking. I pride myself on being able to do lots of things at once where as my husband can't even talk on the phone unless he's sitting down in a quiet room. I have lists of all of the projects and plans that fill my brain on a daily basis so I can get them organized (and maybe accomplished). BUT, chemobrain is a real phenomenon that has just kicked into high gear. With the steroids and the chemo, I am really losing it! Sometimes, when I'm feeling slightly energetic I will start a task like unloading the dishwasher. I'll get about half of the top rack done and think, "Oh, I need to write some appointments on the calendar before I forget". So I'll dart over and start filling in all kinds of things that I need to remember. Then I'll notice that we need to take out the recycling so I'll haul it into the garage. Then I'll notice that we need more water and will go sit at the computer to order some water to be delivered. While I'm at it I'll check my e-mail and get distracted with that. Then, I'll eventually wander back to the kitchen to see that the dishwasher is still standing open waiting to be finished!!! Ahhh! Now, I'm too tired to do it!

I'M NOT CRYING!

I've become one of those little old ladies who carries a wadded up tissue in her hand. My eyes are constantly watering to the point of making them blurry. I have to dab them or they actually start streaming down my face! I believe it's actually because they are dry and my eyes are trying to compensate by over-producing tears.

I'M FEELING HOT, HOT, HOT!

And not in a good way! Hot flashes suck! There you are just sitting there comfortably watching a movie on the sofa or trying to go to sleep when all of a sudden you get extremely hot and start sweating profusely! Yes, even your bald head is glistening with sweat. You reach for the nearest piece of paper ot frantically fan yourself thinking you can beat the flash before you actually start dripping, but alas, no. Now, my poor children have become the fan patrol as they are constantly asked to get up and turn the fan on or off depending on whether I'm having a hot flash or not. They actually don't seem to mind and in fact, laugh at me every time I ask them to do it.

MAKE-UP TIPS FROM RAGGEDY ANN

Yes, I'm finally starting to lose my eyelashes and eyebrows. It really is more distressing than losing your hair because although you can color in your eyebrows to some degree, you can't do anything about those dang eyelashes. You can use lots of extra eyeliner to make you look like you actually have eyes in your swollen face, but you still just don't look quite right. I've thought about drawing luscious looking eyelashes like my childhood Raggedy Ann, but I figure that would be super scary! Fake eyelashes aren't recommended due to the risk of the adhesives causes skin problems. Oh, well. For now, I still have a few. I haven't been able to wear mascara on them due to the aforementioned crying/tearing, so people will just have to get used to it (including me!).

LAYING IN BED EATING BON BONS (OR ANTACIDS!)

Ok, well, I have been pretty tired after coming off of the high dose steroids and not being able to sleep all week. On about the 3rd or 4th day after treatment, I get very tired and have a very low tolerance for activity. Even getting up to go to the bathroom or go get a drink makes my heart race and my head swim. It's especially difficult to be unable to play with the kids or make dinner (well, that's not that difficult :), but instead lay on the sofa and let someone else do those things. Things I thought I didn't care about doing (laundry, dishes, wiping butts), suddenly have become important to me (even though I still don't really want to do them). I feel like if I could make myself do those things then I wouldn't be that sick. Chris is totally awesome about everything and waits on me hand and foot. He's my knight in shining armor!


More updates to come soon with pictures!